Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
