dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
