How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
