I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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