She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I forget how to act sober
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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