is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize