I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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