I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
