If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
