I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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