it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
