i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
