if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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