Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
