i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I just found puke in my bra..
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
