Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
