You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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