smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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