yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
