I want to walk on stilts...naked
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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