also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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