I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize