Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
We're too hungover to prance.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
