you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
