Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
vagina is talking i cant
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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