i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
