I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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