So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i dont even know how to be here
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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