idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
