Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
