Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
