I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Randomize
