I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
