It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize