They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
