Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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