I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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