I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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