I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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