I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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