I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
