The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Actions speak louder than pants.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize