oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
