I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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