last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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