The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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