Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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