i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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