I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize