just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
