so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
